Different people date for different reasons. Some people, especially younger adults, aren’t yet looking for anything serious. They are still trying to understand themselves and what they want in life. They’re having fun and are hopeful that they’ll find true love along the way. 

Others, though, have been searching for a while. They are still hoping that they’ll meet their true love eventually. Unfortunately, true love, a lasting love built on more than just instant chemistry, takes more than just batting your eyes or hitting on everyone that you’re attracted to. Finding real love at long last takes an intentional dating approach, utilizing strategy and a little bit of hard work.

Don’t worry, it’s not as complicated as you might think. If you’re like most people who have been unsuccessful at finding true love, you probably feel like you’ve already been hard at work. You’ve been out to the clubs, you’ve attended the socials, you’ve tried online dating, and now you’re just exhausted. What more can you do?

Maybe you’re not even looking for marriage. Maybe you just want a lasting, loving partnership. Someone you can count on and trust, someone who will be there through thick and thin. 

Regardless of the technicalities, if you’re seriously searching for true and lasting love, know that marriage-minded dating is different and can help you find your forever partner.

Because finding lasting love in whatever form isn’t about working harder. It’s about working smarter! So, what’s the difference, and why does it take marriage-minded dating to find love at long last?

Here are 7 traits of a marriage-minded dater and how they will help you find lasting love.

A marriage-minded, or seriously searching, dater…

1. Has Greater Self-Awareness

These singles have a clear understanding of their relationship values and goals, what they want in a partner, and the life they want to build with that person. Furthermore, they believe that they are worthy of love. They understand what makes them unique and how this is attractive to the right partner. They aren’t looking to impress everyone, just the right one!

2. Embraces New Opportunities

Marriage-minded dating means going where people of like minds or values are. They get involved in activities, groups, or communities where they can meet people with similar interests and values. They have also communicated what they want and who they are looking for to their trusted “connectors”, and are willing to be set up with people in their network. 

3. Does Not Fear Dating

These daters can handle making tough decisions as well as potential rejection. Because they know what they want, they aren’t confused by just anyone who asks them out, or who they may “match” with. They can weed out potentials more easily and with less fear of missing out. Likewise, they understand that when someone isn’t interested in them, this person is not “their person.” That rejection isn’t something to fear but to embrace. It is actually doing them a favor, so they don’t waste time on the wrong person.  

4. Makes Time for Dating 

Like anything in life, you have to make time for what you want. They don’t just shove dating into the margins of their life. A marriage-minded dater prioritizes dating and makes time in their calendar. They are willing to set aside other interests for a while as they pursue love at long last. This extra space will serve them well when they, at last, find true love and need relationship-building time.

5. Dates with Positivity and Confidence

Confidence is a deeply attractive trait.  These daters have acknowledged their insecurities and have decided not to allow them to win. They use that self-awareness to find where and how they excel, and they lead with that, walking into each match or date with optimism. Authenticity, not performance, is what wins because the marriage-minded dater isn’t looking to find love with just anyone; they know to wait for the right one. And to the right person, they are perfectly suited.

6. Chooses Well

This individual is discerning and not arrogant! Because they’ve done the work to understand themselves, their values and goals, their vision of the ideal partner, they can make wise decisions when it comes to who to date. At the same time, they understand that not being right for someone does not make them better than this person and can be gracious. They can kindly end correspondence, or a budding relationship, when it becomes clear that the person is not “the one”.  

7. Invests in Personal Growth

The marriage-minded dater is willing to invest in their personal growth and to learn how to be a better life partner for their future mate. That may mean continuing to work on their emotional health, conflict-management skills, or practicing healthy boundaries. These singles are open to mentorship, relationship coaching, accountability, and know how to handle feedback from trusted sources. 

These 7 traits are what differentiate the seriously searching dater from those just going through the motions.

If you want love at long last, ask yourself: Which of these traits am I practicing, and where can I grow?  

For some, it might be that small, intentional changes are all that’s needed to help you tweak your process so that you can find true love. For others, this list may have made you realize you’ve been going about it all wrong. Either way, there is hope! 

This process works especially well for singles who are serious about commitment and want a relationship built on shared values. If you’re ready to take the next step toward finding love at last, working with a relationship coach can help you date intentionally and confidently. You don’t have to do this alone! I’m here to help. 

Now is the best time to get ready for the New Year’s dating rush. So let’s find a time to chat. Go to https://motivatedtomarry.com/connect-with-coach-amy/ and book your complimentary Meet Your Mate Strategy session today!

Are you truly ready for lasting love?  Go to https://motivatedtomarry.com/quiz/ and take my FREE “Are You Ready to Meet Your Mate” Quiz today! You may be closer to finding “Your Person” than you think.  

FAQ- 7 Traits of a Marriage-Minded Dater, looking to find love at last. 

1. What does marriage-minded dating mean?

It means dating with clarity and purpose. You know your values, what you’re looking for, and the kind of life you want to build with someone so that you can better filter potential matches and dates accordingly. 

2. How is marriage-minded dating different from casual dating?

Casual dating is about fun in the moment. Marriage-minded dating looks at long-term fit. It’s about shared values, emotional readiness, and real compatibility.

3. Can being intentional really help me find love at last?

Yes. Knowing what matters to you helps you choose better matches, avoid the wrong ones, and create space for the right person.

4. How can I handle potential rejection when dating?

Reframe rejection as redirection. It simply means that the person isn’t your match. Letting go sooner protects your time and keeps you open for someone who’s actually right for you.

5. Why does self-awareness matter when dating?

When you understand your needs, strengths, and boundaries, you make healthier choices and avoid repeating old patterns.

6. Do I need to feel confident before dating seriously?

Confidence helps, but authenticity matters more. Start by showing up as you are, comfortable in your own skin, and your confidence will grow. 

7. Can relationship coaching help me find love with the right partner at last?

Coaching gives you clarity, tools, and support so you can date with confidence and find the kind of love you’ve always wanted.

About the Author

is a certified life coach and dating/relationship expert who has helped hundreds of marriage-minded singles find lasting, committed partnerships since 2005. Through private coaching and group programs, she specializes in helping people date with clarity, confidence, and purpose.