Online dating ghostwriter at work on their laptop.

Why Hiring An Online Dating Ghostwriter May Not Be Your Best Bet

12 January 2023

Is setting up your online dating profile the bane of your existence? Do you hate to write about yourself and feel you’re just lousy at it? If you’re having a hard time writing, you may consider hiring an online dating ghostwriter.

An online dating ghostwriter is someone who’ll write your profile for you. However, there are pitfalls when going down this path. So, you’ll want to carefully evaluate whether hiring an online dating ghostwriter is the best move for you.

I’ve been helping my clients improve their online dating profiles for 2 decades. I seem to have a knack for it. And as it turns out, 80% of my successfully coupled clients have met their life partners and spouses through an online dating site or app.

I have a strong opinion about hiring an online dating ghostwriter. Don’t!

In the hundreds of profiles I’ve seen and worked on over the years, I can always tell when a profile is written by someone else. 

The giveaway is that the profiles written by a ghostwriter don’t truly reflect my clients’ personalities.

The most important part of your online dating profile is that it’s authentic and accurately reflects who you are to a potential mate. An easy way to think of it is what you see is what you get.

When I help my clients with their profiles, I have a process to pull out what’s truly important to them — their life vision and critical values. I ask them to use this information as the foundation from which they write their profiles and put their best foot forward.

Yes, I ask my clients to write their own profiles. The reason for this is their profile must sound like them.

After they’ve completed their draft, I edit it. I’m a great editor because I’m able to keep their voice while adding a little polish.

I also often see wonderful traits in my clients and incredible contributions they miss about themselves that I recommend they include in their online dating profiles. I smooth over the rough patches and take out the things that aren’t serving my client.

The end result is always a much better overall profile. My clients get compliments from others who read their profiles. And it does ultimately attract their ideal partner!

Of course, there’s more to a profile than just the essay. It’s how you fill out the details of your profile. You need to know the little nuances.

I often find key things missing when I review my clients’ profiles. Or I recommend they leave out some answers that would make them a target for scammers. (You don’t have to put down your income.)

What is the distance you want to search within? Are you open to a long-distance relationship? This matters.

What else is important not to leave out? Today, your political affiliation is very important.

What I see from online dating ghostwriters is that they embellish things. They go over the top and make the person seem different than they really are.

Then what happens when the real person shows up on a date? Very awkward, indeed!

With a little support, you can write your own profile. However, I usually recommend getting online dating photos taken by a professional photographer.

And I know that even after reading this you may still be considering hiring an online dating ghostwriter. Before you hire someone to write for you, ask to see samples of their work. Ask about their process and what information they need from you to write your profile.

Most of my clients, with a little guidance do a good job of writing their own profiles. Then I take it for the home stretch.

Since most of my clients meet their true love with their online dating profiles, I must be doing something right!

I’m happy to discuss my process and if my Motivated to Marry coaching is for you. Remember, you want to capture the right big picture when it comes to presenting who you are, what your dreams are, and who would be a good partner for you in your online dating profile. And this full picture is what most online dating ghostwriters miss.

Now in the New Year, January and February are the busiest months of the year on online dating sites with the highest volume of singles searching. Will you be ready?

Grab my FREE online dating checklist at where you’ll get my top 10 tips to get you on your way to finding your true love.