For those who had a date for Valentine’s Day, did the day or evening meet your expectations?   I understand there are many disappointed ladies because their dates or spouses fell short of their expectations.   Whose fault is it? 

My dating advice for women is: Men are not mind-readers.   It’s up to us to tell them what we like and what really makes us happy.  They appreciate the heads up!  I leave hints of what I like as a gift.  My husband likes the suggestions.  The easier you make it for them, the better.  He did buy me 3 roses- not a whole bunch.  I appreciate the thought.  We are watching out pennies this year. 

Then there is the card.  We have a ritual of buying each other cards.  I usually give him a serious, mushy card and a cute, funny card.  I also get him a card from the cat and now from our son.  That’s 4 in total.  I should buy stock in Hallmark!  I got 2 cards from him- one from him and one from the cat!   Should I be disappointed? 

No, I am grateful for what I did get and I made a fuss about what I did get.  You see people want to be appreciated for their efforts.  If you do, they are more likely to repeat the behavior in the future.  The key is to bring the subject up a couple of weeks ahead of the holiday to give him a heads up. 
You may say something like, “I got you a couple of card for Valentine’s Day already- I can’t wait to see which ones you got for me!” 

So let’s see:  there’s a card, a gift, flowers – what else?  Oh yes, chocolate!  I told him no chocolate because I’m on a diet.   Then there is the actual date- usually dinner and something else.  We went to a restaurant and a movie.  That is a big night for us since we have a 8 month old baby at home.  So don’t use us as the standard!  Let’s take my friend David who is in a serious relationship as an example.  He took his date to a classy dinner and a jazz club.   I understand it went very well! 

So did your Valentine’s Day live up to your expectations?  What will you do next time to make sure you have a wonderful holiday? 

This inquiring relationship coach wants to know your answers to these questions and any comments you may have.

Your relationship coach,

Amy

P.S.  Get your relationship questions answered and helpful dating and relationship advice!  Join my February (2/24) 2009 tele-coaching group to help move you forward towards your goal of meeting a partner for a committed love relationship with the support of other singles, as well.  We will work on your online dating strategy.  For more information visit www.GetLoveRight.com.  Last chance to sign up!