Marriage-minded singles have a real problem. They are outnumbered by those singles that are not marriage-minded. If you talk to several of your single friends, colleagues, and relatives about their desire to find a marriage partner, you will get one of these responses:
- Her face will turn red and she will sheepishly say, “Well, it would be nice, but….”
- He will laugh and say, “That’s not for me!”
- She will sigh and say, “I guess it’s not in the cards, besides, my life is full just as is”
I remembered helping out at a singles event in the DC area a couple of years back, before my book, Motivated to Marry came out. The host was gracious to let me market my services and do some research for my book by having them fill out the Are You Motivated to Marry? quiz. Many of these 30-something women were horrified when I walked up to them with my clipboard. They wish I would disappear because they did not want to appear marriage-minded in front of their girlfriends and the guys in their vicinity of the conversation! It’s as if to appear Marriage Minded is a taboo subject. I could see in their faces their pleading eyes, “Please get away from me, I don’t want anyone to see that I am a marriage-minded single”. Needless to say, I didn’t get many people filling out my quiz that evening!
Another incident I remembered after I had my new book published was when I saw a bunch of my single 40-something guy pals when I standing around at a strip center waiting for another guy to pick them up to go to a ball game. I had some copies of Motivated to Marry in my handbag. Proudly, I showed them my book.
Being a bunch of guys, they made fun of the title. One friend said, “Nope, I am not motivated, are you?” The other quipped, “No way! I think Henry definitely is though.” They took a look at the book and leafed through it as a courtesy, however, they really showed no interest. On a note, this incident has to be about six years ago, and none of these men are married!
There are two points to this story:
First, some people are scared to admit to others that they are truly marriage-minded when dating. They believe it will reflect poorly on them and make them seem desperate, as well as undesirable. Second, some people are truly NOT interested in getting married. You need to respect that and move on if you find a marriage partner is your main focus in dating.
So the marriage-minded singles dating universe is a much smaller piece of the total singles you will meet out there. Are you truly willing to announce to the world that you are among the marriage-minded singles?