How to Date in a Tough Economy – What’s Your Attitude?

Most people I know have been affected by the awful stock market and the current recession.  Retirement portfolios have been slammed and we all feel less financially secure.  People have been laid off from jobs, and businesses have been down.  Be that as it may, you have a choice. 

Do you want to be a “Sad Sack” with a frown on your face and look like all is lost?  How attractive is that to the opposite sex?  Or do you want to be positive about the future and hold the belief that you can bounce back.  Most people find that attractive- especially when it’s based on reality instead of just Polyanna optimism.  

Hopefully, you have taken some steps to secure your future.  The stock market will eventually come back.  You are being pro-active about your job situation or you are being creative about maintaining and growing your business.  We just have to live long enough to see the stock market turn around and prosperity to return.  Most of us are tightening our belts.  How can you continue to date given your current financial situation? 

I know people who have met love partners when they were unemployed.   They were positive about their future and had a plan in place.  One guy was still living at home with his parents at 38!  He was starting a business and this helped him save money.  His girlfriend understood this.  He is now married, owns a house and has a thriving insurance business. 

Another girlfriend was unemployed and met a guy (they were both in their late 30’s) who was finishing law school.  She did get a new job fairly quickly and he studied for the bar exam.  She had a baby and he did the majority of the baby care while studying.   Both were flexible about their roles and positive about their future. 

So how do you want to come across when you are out there meeting men and women to date?  Do you want to be like Chicken Little expecting the sky to fall?  Or do you want to heed the words of our new President and work to rebuild your future?  My dating advice to you is to consider many people you meet will judge you by your attitude and your actions.  What do you find attractive?   Would you consider dating someone unemployed?

This inquiring relationship coach wants to know!

Your relationship coach,

Amy

P.S.  Get your relationship questions answered and helpful dating advice!  Join my late February 2009 tele-coaching group to help move you forward towards your goal of meeting a partner for a committed love relationship with the support of other singles, as well.  We will work on your online dating strategy.  For more information visit www.GetLoveRight.com.  Save 30 % by signing up by 1/31/09!

One comment on “How to Date in a Tough Economy – What’s Your Attitude?
  1. charlotte says:

    I really like internet dating! I must be the only one. First, it’s my chance to show of how creative I am BEFORE going out on a bunch of dates. Also – my sense of humor before going out on a bunch of dates. I know what works on a 1st date – you listen to him, you are interested in him, you compliment him. So your first date, you maybe can show off your sense of humor – if he has any sense of humor (I actually think men in general have a better sense of humor than women. Most of my women friends don’t make funny comments, and most men I know, do!) – but on your first normal date, and maybe for the first 6 dates, I don’t have chance to show off my creativity unless I invite him to my house. And now a days, you have to be so careful about who you let into your home.

    So, I get to “meet” all the guys who are single out there and looking on the internet. I get to make my impression of him in the privacy of my own space, without hurting his feelings. I take a good photo of myself, and I think my profile is pretty cute: Mary Ann looking for the Professor. It’s an old TV show so I’m looking for someone who knows the show, who knows who Mary Ann is, but is also in a time warp state of mind where I think of myself as a single girl in my 20’s and he thinks of himself as pretty smart and attractive, and able to seduce me! I’m not seduced by money – and this message tells the guys out there, this about me. Also it tells them that I am fun to talk to, and don’t have to always be serious (by choosing such a show). My bio says I’m looking for a Jewish guy and my kid is the most important person right now. I’ve been clicked on a thousand times, but have had a response that is maybe 1% of all those that clicked on me. A few times I end up chatting with someone who doesn’t even live here – so profiles do slip through the cracks. He’s chatting with me though, because he finds me attractive. good for the ego. It’s also good for me that the ones that do NOT find me attractive in my profile or my photo, will not get in touch with me… they don’t have to hurt my feelings for no reason. So I’ve been to lunch with a dozen men, and enjoyed my conversation with all of them. they were all intelligent enough to feel confident enough to make the date with me. so maybe when they do meet me, I’m not smart enough for them. But it seems that most men are not looking for smart women anyway… that’s why I felt comfortable saying I was Mary Ann… Did Mary Ann have a career? what did she do before she took that 3 hour cruise? No one seems to care! But we all know that Ginger was a flashy model and dumb too. I’m neither.

    So these are the reasons I like internet dating. You do a lot of weeding before the date. Then I’ve gone on the 1st date, and he’ll say, “you’re not what I’m looking for”. that’s OK – he wasn’t what I was looking for either, but I was not uncomfortable at any time with any of them. they treated me respectfully and we had an interesting conversation. That wasn’t true when I would meet a averagely good looking guy at a single’s dance and he would take my number. After going out I would find out awful things, and sometimes even be afraid to be with him. Maybe this is such a good thing for me now, because I know what to look for – and can tell if they are really weird a lot quicker than I could when I was in my 20’s. I’m not looking to take care of a sick old guy. My mother had to do that with my father, but she was married to him for 50 years before that issue came up. To tell you the truth – that is the worst part of being divorced. at least if I have to babysit my husband when he gets old and sick, I can know that he took care of me along the way too. But now, I could be with an old guy that needs baby care, and I never got any of the benefits of being married to him. I expect men to become incontinent, but they don’t expect that will happen to their new wife (only the old one). I want to have a love affair – not be a nurse maid. So what I want will be MUCH harder to find than it was 30 years ago. I was great fun to be with when I was younger. My x-husband even told me that he married me because I was “fun”. But reality sets in, and with the stuff of life, you can’t always be fun. Too bad for the new guy… some of my “fun” and flat stomach are just gone with my advanced years. I resent this the most, and I did when I was in my 20’s and an “old” guy (40 years old) would ask me out. He wanted young, smooth skin, but didn’t think that I would also want young smooth skin, and a high libido – because I assumed that men lost their libido after age 40. And they loose their prostate and their ability soon after that. So what’s in it for me? I’m serious. I wasn’t going to leave my husband because he had stopped having sex with me because I figured he did have sex with me at one time. But everyone accepts and Expects that he will leave me for sex with a younger girl!!!! That’s so unfair

    I’m not leaving any room for another comment.

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