{"id":3852,"date":"2019-04-05T11:43:04","date_gmt":"2019-04-05T15:43:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/motivatedtomarry.com\/stage\/?p=3852"},"modified":"2022-03-10T11:49:40","modified_gmt":"2022-03-10T16:49:40","slug":"7-questions-you-must-ask-yourself-if-you-want-find-true-love-before-you-even-start-dating","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/motivatedtomarry.com\/stage\/7-questions-you-must-ask-yourself-if-you-want-find-true-love-before-you-even-start-dating\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Questions You Must Ask Yourself If You Want To Find True Love \u2014 Before You Even Start Dating"},"content":{"rendered":"

You have to know what you want, before you can find it.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Finding love \u2014 true love \u2014 is such a simple thing, right? At least it seemed so, given what you saw in the movies and all the fairy tales you grew up with. But do you really know how to find love or if dating will really work for you?<\/p>\n

The problem is that when it comes to finding your soulmate in real life, things aren\u2019t nearly so simple. In fact, they can be totally confusing, frustrating and leave you asking, “Why is love so hard to find<\/a>?”<\/em><\/p>\n

However, looking for love doesn\u2019t have to be a continuously painful endeavor. It doesn\u2019t have to be a fruitless search. It also doesn\u2019t mean you have to settle for \u201cMr.\/Ms. Right Now,\u201d instead of \u201cMr.\/Ms. Right Forever.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Before<\/a><\/p>\n

If you know what questions to ask yourself\u00a0before<\/em>\u00a0you start dating, you can get clear on your goals and priorities from the start, which can help make your search for true love with your soulmate successful.<\/p>\n

Here are 7 deep questions to ask yourself – before\u00a0<\/em><\/strong>you start dating – if you want to find true love with your soulmate.<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. Why am I searching for true love now?<\/h2>\n

Everyone has a different reason for wanting to meet their soulmate and find love. And some people have more than one.<\/p>\n

Maybe you hear your biological clock ticking, and you want to have kids. Maybe you want to show your ex that you are lovable, despite what he said.<\/p>\n

Maybe you\u2019re simply ready to have that one, special companion to share life experiences and Sunday morning coffee and conversation. Maybe you want to share your life with someone who shares your passions and interests.<\/p>\n

Whatever your reason is, it\u2019s important to know\u00a0why<\/em>\u00a0you\u2019re searching for love now. It can help you gauge how important it is that you find your ideal mate at this particular time in your life. Also, you may want to see how your reasons line up with the people you’re dating, too, to understand their motivations for wanting to find true love.<\/p>\n

2. What is my timeline for finding true love?<\/h2>\n

Now it’s time to think about your time frame for meeting your Mr.\/Ms. Right. Do you want to be in a relationship within three months, six months, one year, or five years? Setting your timeline will help you establish realistic expectations about what comes next.<\/p>\n

For example, if you want to find true love in three months, then you\u2019ll need to start meeting tons of potential dates and going on lots of dates ASAP!<\/p>\n

Also, think about sharing your timing expectations with any potential partners. Again, it\u2019s important to see if you are both on the same timeline or not.<\/p>\n

3. What’s my budget?<\/h2>\n

It doesn\u2019t matter if you\u2019re a man or woman. Dating requires spending some money.<\/p>\n

And the easiest way to figure out what your budget needs to be is to look at your timeline.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re going to meet the one for you within the timeline you\u2019ve set, how many dates will you need to go on each month?<\/p>\n

Now, think about how much you\u2019ll need to spend, not only for the means of meeting people for dating, but also for each of those dates. (Ladies, consider if you may need to get your hair done or want to buy a new dress!)<\/p>\n

How will you meet the people you\u2019re going to date? Online dating is one possibility. Some of these sites are free and others have a fee. For men and women who are seriously searching, I recommend a paid site.<\/p>\n

Are you going to invest in a dating service or go to singles events? What about a matchmaker or relationship coach? I know I paid for both when I turned forty and was looking to get married and have a family. I had no time to waste!<\/p>\n

It\u2019s by asking yourself questions like this (or working with someone who knows the right questions to ask) that you can set a realistic budget for your how-to-find-true-love plan.<\/p>\n

4. Who am I searching for?<\/h2>\n

Believe it or not, most people start searching for their true love without having any idea of what they think is important in a soulmate. And that\u2019s a huge mistake. These people waste a lot of time dating people who are just not right for them or don\u2019t share the same goals they have in life.<\/p>\n

However, since you\u2019re serious about finding love now, it\u2019s important to put in the effort to know who you\u2019re searching for \u2014\u00a0before<\/em> you seriously start your search for the one.<\/p>\n

So, think about what you must have in a relationship. This should include your values and life goals because your true love will have complimentary ones.<\/p>\n

[Recommended Reading –\u00a0Online Dating Profile Advice To Let People Know You’re Marriage-Minded<\/em><\/a>]<\/strong><\/p>\n

What are the deal breakers that would cause you to walk away from a relationship or just swipe left? Deal breakers can be large or small. And they don\u2019t have to make sense to anyone else. Your deal breakers are yours. Only you know what you need to be happy in a relationship.<\/p>\n

By getting clear about your must-have\u2019s and deal breakers you\u2019ll be able to more quickly evaluate your potential mates and either move on or invest in the relationship. And that will save you lots of time \u2014 and potentially heartbreak \u2014 in the long run. And you won\u2019t feel bad about moving on.<\/p>\n

5. What priority will my search for true love take?<\/h2>\n

Finding love will take effort and time on your part, so you need to get real about how important it is to you. Is it more important than your job or business? Is it more important than sitting at home and watching every sporting event or chick flick on TV this weekend? Many times, one needs to get past their inertia!<\/p>\n

Finding true love needs to be one of your top three priorities or it won\u2019t work. Plus, most men want to know you have time for them when you start dating. They are looking for a relationship, not a pen pal!<\/p>\n

So you need to decide how you\u2019ll fit searching for true love into your already full life.<\/p>\n

6. Who can I count on for support and accountability?<\/h2>\n

As with any goal, having the right people to support your efforts is priceless. And the right people are the ones who will cheer you on and help hold you accountable to what you say you\u2019ll do to find true love. So, of course, they\u2019ll need to be positive and truly want the best for you. Raving fans only need to apply!<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, the right people aren\u2019t always your friends and family. It\u2019s not because they don\u2019t love you. It\u2019s because they don\u2019t want their relationship with you to change.<\/p>\n

Sometimes, friends and family can feel threatened when they realize you\u2019re spending a lot of time with someone else. Then, without even realizing it, they won\u2019t be as supportive as you truly need.<\/p>\n

So, you\u2019ll want to find positive and affirming people who can truly support you in your search, especially those who don\u2019t have any skin in the game.<\/p>\n

7. How will you keep your vision alive?<\/h2>\n

No matter what goal you’re tackling, it\u2019s always good to plan for the unexpected. And your how-to-find-true-love plan needs to include dealing with the unexpected, too.<\/p>\n

Sometimes, searching for true love can be deceiving and not turn out how you\u2019d hope. Imagine that, at some point, you think you\u2019ve found the one for you and start falling in love. Then, you later discover they have a habit (or found out something that\u2019s one of your deal breakers) that prompts you to have to end the relationship.<\/p>\n

If this happened, it would be easy to get stuck in the disappointment and put your search off or stop looking altogether. However, when you think about things like this\u00a0before<\/em>\u00a0they happen, you can revisit your plans for how to keep your vision of your ideal mate alive and continue your search, despite the disappointment.<\/p>\n

Dating requires you to be very resilient. Many times, there are lessons to learn from your dating experiences that help you refine your approach to finding true love and choose better next time.<\/p>\n

Once you ask yourself these seven deep questions, you\u2019ll have your first draft of your how-to-find-true-love plan. Yes, it\u2019s only your first draft. And that\u2019s because, as you begin your search, you\u2019ll discover things about yourself and things about other people that may change your plan.<\/p>\n

As you keep refining your search for true love and adapting your plan accordingly, you\u2019ll discover it\u2019ll be easier and easier to move on from dating the wrong people \u2014 and start dating more of the right people.<\/p>\n

Then, before you know it, you’ll have met that special person, and there\u2019ll be a recognition that you\u2019ve finally found true love with your soulmate.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re ready to explore working with a dating coach to find true love, reach out to me, Coach Amy. I can help you as I\u2019ve helped hundreds of others who are motivated to marry and wanted her online dating profile advice.\u00a0 Connect with me at\u00a0https:\/\/motivatedtomarry.com\/stage\/connect-with-coach-amy\/<\/a>.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Originally published on YourTango<\/a>.<\/p>\n

PS: Take my FREE Quiz at www.mtmquiz.com<\/a> and discover what you need to do to begin successfully dating for marriage!<\/h3>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You have to know what you want, before you can find it. Finding love \u2014 true love \u2014 is such a simple thing, right? At least it seemed so, given what you saw in the movies and all the fairy tales you grew up with. 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