Autumn has arrived! Are you as excited as I am? Nature’s explosion of warm colors, pumpkin spice lattes, Halloween costumes and holiday decorations in all the stores – it all feels so good! But nothing beats the togetherness that defines this time of year. And, for all you singles out there, that means taking a good look at your dating process. Is it ready for the holiday season?
Fall is a natural time to put renewed attention and effort into dating. And that’s a good thing. After all, as soon as the holidays are over, a new year stands waiting. Time for new goals and bigger dreams!
During my more than 16 years as a relationship and dating expert, I’ve become very in-tune with my clients – where they’re succeeding, where they’re coming up short.
And I’ve developed a dating process that has been proven time and time again to convert shortcomings into successes.
I’ve noticed with all of my clients that there are specific steps in the dating process where they’ve been coming up short.
And that’s where my work as a dating and relationship coach comes in.
My first task is to evaluate what they are and aren’t doing. Then I can teach them the skills and strategies necessary for meeting “that special someone.”
Curious about how you may be falling short with your dating efforts?
Here’s the dating process I recommend you follow:
Step 1: Get out and meet new people for dating.
- Old habits die hard. But continuing to do the same old thing that has never worked won’t help you find someone new worth dating. If you’re not trying new things to meet people, then you’re falling short.I help my clients find places to meet quality people with whom they will naturally click. Do you know where the seriously searching singles are?
- If you’re not dating online, you’re missing out. Given that 80% of my successfully coupled clients met online (this is consistent year after year), a pass on online dating is a pass on opportunity.
- If you’re online and not meeting the right kind of quality person, it’s time to ask yourself, “Why not?”Seriously searching and marriage-minded singles take to the web when they want to meet a life partner. So learning how to identify those who are truly motivated may be the missing piece in your dating process.
- If you’re not asking your friends and family to support you in your search, you’re missing out. Everyone knows a single person.And, if you’re asking but coming up empty-handed, it may be a case of how you’re asking. That’s the difference between success and frustration.
Step 2: Know how to qualify people as “the right one.”
- Many of my clients are utilizing the wrong information to evaluate someone as “the one.”During your coaching experience, we tweak how you’re evaluating people. That way you gain greater clarity on how to identify seriously searching singles who are a good fit for you. (And that takes into account your need to be attracted to someone.)
- Are you cutting out good potential partners too soon?Actually, this was one of my issues. I was too judgy, and I was often wrong with my assumptions.
You must be open and ready when the right person shows up. Preparing you for that encounter is a big part of my coaching process.
- Are you following up in a timely manner? If not, then this is an area where your improvement could bring about great results.Many people don’t want to seem needy, so they hesitate to follow up.
With the right person, you don’t have to play games.
My husband asked me for a subsequent date while we were still on our first date. He was interested and motivated, and I appreciated him showing interest and being proactive.
Step 3: Solidify the relationship to last for the long haul.
- Some people are great at dating and horrible at creating a lasting relationship.Do you avoid asking for what you need? Do you walk on eggshells?
If so, that’s not a good sign.
You need to feel comfortable with asking for what you need in a relationship. And knowing how to do this at the onset of a relationship is critical.
- If you’re not aligning your expectations with your partner, you’re not setting yourself up for a successful relationship. And, if you’re making assumptions and not checking them out, your budding relationship will suffer.Consider why your last relationship broke up. Did you have unfulfilled (and uncommunicated) expectations?
Don’t drag old, unsuccessful habits into a new and promising relationship.
- If you don’t have an expert guiding you onto and along the right path, you’re missing out on an important resource for relationship success.My coach helped my husband and me have a deeper understanding of how we interact. This has helped us when we have misunderstandings.
These couples’ skills are critical so you have the tools to handle things when they get a bit rocky. (All couples have disagreements. It’s how you handle them that will determine your longevity.)
If you want to see where you fall short in the Motivated to Marry dating process, I recommend you take this quiz.
There’s a body of knowledge that will improve your chances for having a successful, long-term relationship. This is your insurance policy.
I invite you to join my Meet Your Mate This Year coaching group so you don’t miss a beat with dating.
Your time is too precious to waste. Are you going to continue to make any of these dating mistakes?
Let’s talk soon so I can shorten your learning curve, and get you on the path to finding true love before the holidays.
Go to www.talkwithcoachamy.com so I can determine where you may be falling short with your dating process.
Always wishing you the best in life and love,
Coach Amy
PS: Visit www.talkwithcoachamy.com and let’s see where you need to tweak your dating efforts.
