Are you dating for marriage? Here is a great example of one of my clients who thought she was dating for marriage, Karen, who had never been married,in her late 30’s, and has been dating and been in several relationships off and on for most of her adult life. When she started coaching with me she was in relationship with a promising professional man in his early 40’s for about 2 years and was hoping to bring it to the next level of commitment, namely marriage!
Although her boyfriend has been there for her for emotional support at times, through the coaching she realized that he was unable to truly commit to the relationship and that he would never really step up to the plate. Marriage was not in his mindset. He was happy with the status quo. He got what he wanted from the relationship, a date for the weekends and intimacy- no strings attached. And this could have gone on for years!
So what’s the difference with dating for marriage and just dating? Here are some ways that dating differs for those who are Motivated to Marry:
1. Motivated to Marry dating has a sense of purpose with a plan of action.
2. Those dating for marriage are aware of their core relationship values and desires to find out how their date’s values matches up with their values.
3. Motivated to Marry daters are mindful of their dating roadblocks and how to maneuver around them.
4. Those dating for marriage maintain a long term perspective when dating and focus on dating for keeps.
5. Motivated to Marry Daters eliminate inappropriate partners more quickly and do not tolerate wishy washy people who don’t know what they really want in life.
6. Those dating for marriage communicate their relationship expectations to their partner sooner than later to make sure they are on the same page.
7. Motivated to Marry daters are aware of their dating timeframes and how long they will remain in a relationship before they expect to be engaged and subsequently married.
Through our coaching Karen was encouraged to express her desire to be married and have a family with her boyfriend. What she found out was that he had no intention to take the relationship to the next level and did not have the capacity to go deeper with the relationship as she desired. Unfortunately she had given him two years of her life hoping that he would be the one.
Finally she got up the nerve to break up with that boyfriend and within a month, since she was open to a new relationship. She was now available to consider dating a man who showed interest in her at work Given all the internal work she did with the our coaching, Karen now had the tools to ask for what she wanted in a relationship and found her new prospect to be in line with her needs and expectations. They quickly became exclusive and got engaged within the six months! And they were married last September 2017.
Dating for marriage takes focus and courage to go after what you truly want. Are you ready to make the commitment to yourself to find true love leading to marriage? And, what’s been stopping you from moving forward to marriage in your romantic relationships? Answering these questions will lead you to helping you create the right plan of action in order to finally meet your mate!
PS. To get the same support that Karen did for your dating for marriage efforts, go to www.TalkwithCoachAmy.com to sign up for a complimentary Meet Your Mate Strategy session. Let me show you how to get you on the right track to find your marriage mate this year! Both private coaching and group coaching opportunities are now available to you to get the support and knowledge it takes to get love right. If you are truly motivated and want to meet your mate this year, then let’s talk ASAP!